PRAYERS OF REMEMBRANCE, CONSOLATION AND HOPE
FOR THOSE LEFT BEHIND
AFTER A SUICIDE:

LETTER OF REMEMBRANCE
 
My dear ________ 
 
As you read this letter, we would like you to know that we miss you and that so much has changed because of you. We always thought this sort of thing happened to other people, not us.
Maybe, in your heart, you thought you were doing us a favour by taking your life. What hurt most is that you never really said ‘Goodbye’ or gave us a chance to say ‘Goodbye’. We have cried as we tried to understand your despair, your misery. 
At times we have been angry with you for what you did to yourself, for what you did to us. At times we felt responsible for your death. We have searched for what we did or failed to do, for the clues we missed. 
Yet we know that we didnt make your choice. We are learning to stop feeling responsible for your death. If we were responsible for you, youd still be alive. 
We all think of you so often, even when it hurts to remember. We are really lonely for your presence and whenever we hear your songs, we still cry for you. We feel sad that youre not here to share so many moments with us. Thats when our mornings have no beginning and our nights seem long as winter. 
Slowly though, its getting less hard. We try to remember the good times. Maybe youve seen us smile a little more. Were learning to live again, realising that we cannot die because you chose to die. We pray that you are at peace. At the end of our days we look forward to being with you again – Peace.
 
PRAYER for those who have left us: 
Lord our God, you are always faithful and quick to show mercy.
We pray for our brothers and sisters who were suddenly and
violently taken from us. Come swiftly to their aid, have mercy on them
and comfort their families and friends by the power and protection of the cross.
We ask this through Christ our Lord,
Amen.
 
PRAYER for those left behind:  
God we believe in your tender love for us.
Give comfort and strength to those who mourn today.
Take away any feeling of guilt and ease the burden of regret.
Keep them in your care and help them
to renew their lives in a spirit of trust.
We ask this in faith, through Christ, Our Lord. Amen.
 
READING Mark 15:33-37
My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?
When the sixth hour came there was darkness over the whole land until the ninth hour. And at the ninth hour Jesus cried out in a loud voice, Eloi, Eloi, lama sabachtani?, which means, My God, my God, why have you forsaken me? When some of those who stood by heard this, they said, Listen, he is calling on Elijah. Someone ran and soaked a sponge in vinegar and, putting it on a reed, gave it him to drink saying, Wait! And see if Elijah will come to take him down. But Jesus gave a loud cry and breathed his last.
We remember those who have taken their own lives:
May they come to know the tender compassion of the God who created them in love.
 
We lift up to the Lord those bereaved by the suicide of someone they love:
As they continue their journey may they meet Christ in the support of others.
 
We pray in hope for all:
May the Spirit of God open our ears to each other
and may the circle of light generated
shine in the dark places of our lives.
 
Concluding Prayer
Daily Candlemas Prayer (Adapted)
Lord,
You are the Saviour of those who trust in you.
You are the God of the humble,
the help of the oppressed,
the support of the weak,
the refuge of the forsaken,
the Saviour of the despairing.
Please hear our prayer this day.
Good Shepherd, lift our burden of isolation,
loneliness and depression.
 
In our turmoil, pain and anguish let us know
that we are loved and accepted by you.
As the Good Shepherd you are searching for us
to carry us in your arms.
 
Jesus, our burden can never be too heavy for you;
you carried the cross of shame and humiliation.
Surround us with your protecting love
and lead us to confide our pain to another – Someone.
 
From the book Circle of Care – Liturgies for times of special need,  a book of thoughtful prayers, reflections and liturgies designed to bring some of the healing light of Christ to a range of sensitive pastoral situations ranging from birth to death.
Editor Fr Pat ODonoghue. Available from Veritas Publications. www.veritas.ie

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